To Bra or not to Bra, that is the Question

As a introduction to this post, Cathy and I are obsessed with Craigslist missed connection. And not so much that we think we're going to meet our Prince Charming this way, but that people are so dumb, and the posts are so dumb and poorly written, and it really provides tons of entertainment! Sometimes the site is blocked at work, and other times, not. We think it's unblocked a few hours a day so our nerdy IT guy can either post or check his missed connection.

From: Cathy
Why weren't we on this one? {Enter text rather than link}

you were with your friend wed at a table by the window.

you were wearing jeans and a white sweater that showed off your black bra strap (very sexy!)

had to let you know that you are stunning.

i was meeting a client and couldn't break away to let you know how attractive you are, but i hope you see this.

signed
an admirer :)

From: Maxine
Yea, do you think he thought one of us had red hair? :)

From: Cathy
Yours has a reddish tint in the light!

From: Maxine
i don't think i was wearing a white sweater with a sexy black bra strap showing. if anything that would be you. so let's see, me with the hair, you with the outfit. really, you can't blame him for confusing who was who, we are both gorgeous. ;0


From: Cathy
Maxi, you and your white Grandma bras.


From: Maxine
well...yours are black grandma bras!

From: Cathy
It's because we both wear like 36FFFF so they look huge!

From: Maxine
You know that's the only reason!

Yours is more 34FFFF, and mine is now 36FFF


From: Cathy
But seriously T said she got a bra fitting and she was 36 D. I don'[t believe that for a second. She goes braless all the time.

From: Maxine
i agree. either that or she needs to be wearing a bra. ain't nothing sexy about sagging double d titties bouncing around in a white tank top.

From: Cathy
But the celebs do it to go grocery shopping...


From: Maxine
but they're a or b at best. i do want to do it one time, just pop into the store in the summer in my wife beater, nipples blazing in the produce refrigerated section. talk about the perfect pick up line. "are you stealing raisins, or just happy to see me?"

Shoes and Caesar

From: Cathy
http://shoeblogs.com/2007/11/20/louboutin-miss-fred-tacco-vs-steve-madden-becks/


From: Maxine
OMG! It totally does look like the sole was photo shopped a different color! There's NO way those are photos of two different shoes!


From: Cathy
Or do you think they photoshopped it to bamboozle you into thinking it was the same?


From: Maxine
And I'm sure it could bamboozle most, but not two en vogue fashionistas like ourselves.

So, it looks like it will be just you, me, and OL on Friday. Why did we call that again?


From: Cathy
Typical, huh? The triumvirate!

So, "CB" just texted me "R u mad at me?" He's not a jokester, he's a drama king! He really is like a girl. First I liked it, because he liked to snuggle, but now it's getting on my nerves.


From: Maxine
What! He did not text that!? I totally agree with you, he likes drama. He only wants someone if there's drama. For example, when he was dating someone else, it made dating you fun, when you were mad that he was dating someone else, he liked that too, then when things are normal, he gets bored. I can see why it would be annoying.

And do NOT link me in a triumvirate with OL! But if you must, I call Caesar, you can be Pompey, and OL can be Crassus just because I think that sounds like the least desirable.


From: Cathy
See, I try to have a drama-free relationship and that backfires too! Darmed if you do, darmed if you don't!

However, Crassus was extremely wealthy..which goes to show you, put in your 160 hour months, and you, too, will be rewarded!


From: Maxine
Well, what's more important, wealth or a lasting impression on me thousands of years in the future in World History 101? I don't really remember anything about Crassus other than a member of the original triumvirate. Thus why we would be Caesar and Pompey (plus they have amusement rides named after them!)

Also! Which Caesar was it? Julius? E tu Brutus? Man, nevermind, I don't want Caesar after all. Is today's version of stabbing a friend the "intervention." Maybe I am Caesar! :(


From: Cathy
Haha! That was a good analogy! So true!

It was Julius Caesar....

Anyway, I need to get out of here. I want to hit up DSW, but you KNOW the traffic is going to be horrendous!


From: Maxine
Better bring snacks

Nothing you can do that can't be done

All You Need Is Luv's - Funny bloopers are a click away

I just wanted to take a moment to blog about the "All you need is Luvs" commercial. Am I the only one who finds it perverse? The baby is humping the bear for crying out loud! Like every dog in every movie/tv show does with a large stuffed toy animal. The commercial keeps you in suspense about what it's selling until you've already been sufficiently disturbed. Then, just as you're about to call the FCC you see the dad counting down and you learn the commercial is about "luvs" not about free love to animals from kiddies. Heather must really be taking Paul to the bank if he needs to stoop this low to earn some cash from the royalties. George must be turning over in his grave.

Hope everyone had a fab Thanksgiving, xoxo Maxi

Not too much going on these days...

We haven't posted in awhile, really it's because nothing exciting has happened. Let's see if I can recap the week in a few short bullet points.

We discussed that if we didn't eat for a few months, we could buy these totally hotttt Christian Louboutin Miss Fred Tacco Boots. Cat can wear tall heels like this, but I just can't. I love the way they make my legs look, but I have to limit at 2 inches, otherwise I'd break my neck. My aristocratic feet can't handle it (too delicate!) :)



We learned that OC drives his GF to work. They must be getting serious if they're commuting like an old married couple. A little bit of me died inside this holiday season when I learned that.

Dido's is definitely over. Just straight up, no one goes there anymore. And we're loyal customers, and we go back and go back, hoping this time it will be different, but alas, it never is. I need to grieve inside, but accept it and realize we just won't be returning there anymore.

I've gained 1 lb this week, and who knows what's going to happen over Thanksgiving! Yikes!

The Coach wants me to go visit him, but I don't know. The cons (the cost, he'll be working most of the time, I'll be tooling around by myself, the cost, the fact that we were just a fling, but he's bored and lonely and seems to think we had something serious and worth missing, I'm not really excited about the prospect of what will be an expensive booty call because I just don't want to sleep with him, nor do I need to get laid) definitely outweigh the pros (it would be nice to get away for a weekend, and that's all I got there.)

Cat's been set up with a hottie! Can't wait for her to meet him next week!

Guess that's it, have a happy Thanksgiving!

xoxo, Maxi

I did NOT just read this!

Good grief green granolas!

My favorite is number 10.

Read the article here

Hindu Goddess

On days where Cat and I don't have anything to blog, we're just going to post our email strains from that day's work. These usually are the best anyways! And to see how our train of though evolves is quite scary! Enjoy!

As background, Cat and I had been talking about the 8 limbed girl in India who recently went through surgery to remove her twin that died in the womb and attached herself to the healthy twin. The girl was really adorable, and I was so relieved when I heard that she made it through the surgery safely. Today on foxnews.com, there was a follow up article.



From: Maxine
Why does the mom looked pissed?

And the girl isn't as smiley, I bet she's in pain. Poor little thing.

http://www.foxnews.com/photoessay/0,4644,2600,00.html#1_0

From: Cathy
Yeah, the mom does look pissed. Maybe she feels like it's an invasion of privacy. But I mean, the entire thing was paid for so of course you're going to lose a little bit of privacy. The dad didn't really look pissed.

For the little girl think of what her body must be thinking now. "Holy sh1t! You're missing half your body! What is going on here?"

From: Maxine
Yea, you have to be right about the mom. But she had to have known. Otherwise, they would have "kept her hidden" like they were doing earlier. I wonder almost if she's sad that her daughter is no longer a Hindu "goddess."

Your thought of the girl made me laugh. But I bet your right, total shock to the body.

So, I think I finally figured out exactly what it is that's wrong with SW's clothes. Did you see the outfit today? I mean, it's a nice outfit, but she looks like she's walking to Chem class, not to work for a Fortune 100 company. And then I thought about it, all her outfits are like that. Way too collegiate for a professional environment. It's not just that they're tight (because I think a button down in black trousers could probably look more slutty if you dressed like they do on TV for work) but it's that they look like a 19 year old sorority girl. Between that and the sw, she's really keeping herself down. If we worked in a larger office, I guarantee she would be overlooked for promotions all the time, but in this smaller office, where people are held more accountable, her actual work is speaking for her (which is the way it should be, but rarely is). Don't you agree?

From: Cathy
You could be right. In the smaller office, people know her work. In a larger office couldn't you see the boss equivalent thinking, who's SW, again? And someone saying, "The one who wears the sparkly tops."

From: Maxine
Haha! Oh that fake convo made me laugh...because it's true. It's totally the type of thing that people would use to classify you.

From: Cathy
How do you think people would classify you? The SB always going to the gym?

From: Maxine
Or would I be the FB always going to the gym but never loses any weight.


From: Cathy
Well, that's what Jim thinks anyway...

From: Maxine
Haha! I'd love to see Jim as a cartoon character. Wouldn't you? Mumbling under his breath while all the shenanigans of the office happen around him. You'd be on his side in the cartoon. Thinking we're a bunch of crazy monkeys.

From: Cathy
See this is why I wish I could draw! I would totally make funny cartoons!



Is that monkey wearing nail polish?

Greetings from Austin, TX

Dear Maxi....

I could never log in, I swear.

I am calling to report from Austin. Let me begin with my flight. I want to tell you about the hunk I sat next to on the plane. You would have loved this guy. Blue eyes, sand colored hair, southern accent, tall, and big. Just your type. The type to scoop you up in his arms and throw you around like a rag doll. I felt so petite next to him. His arms firmly took up residence on the armrest, forcing me to queeze my shoulders together a little. However, it wasn't uncomfortable. He was big in a a strong muscular way, in a sexy football player way. The warmth of his arm against mine and the lull of the plane put me in a peaceful sleep.

Anway, so the plane is landing and the pilot annouces the weather in Austin. "....crshhhh. This is the pilot. The weather in beaustiful Austin is slightly windy, 84 degrees..." I jumped and almost slapped the guy next to me! 84 degrees? I had departed earlier that morning in a parka, a scarf, and a heavy sweater. 84 degrees! This trip was going to be wonderful.

My friend is calling me to go grab a burger and do some vintage shopping. More reports later.

Random Friday Question - Who Would You Rather?

First, let me begin this post by expressing my disappointment in Cat. Really, she has totally let me down in our blogging world. Can't even take the time to comment on last week's question, can't be bothered to take 5 minutes out of her day to write a post. Whatever.

It's Friday, so that means random question Friday. I like getting your mind thinking first thing in the morning on a Friday. Especially since usually Thursday nights are number one Happy Hour days which turn into all night affairs with Cat and I dragging our lap tops around the bar in our work professional attire making it obvious to everyone we've been drinking since 5 pm!

Ok, back to the point of the post, in the tradition of my favorite mid-work day guilty pleasure http://www.tmz.com/, who would you rather get busy with? (And this has nothing to do with birthdays, like the tmz posts are).

Greasy Bear late at night when he's at the height of his sweat, grease and drunk, or, Al Gore?

Ok, both of these gross me out to no end. Have you seen pictures of Brandon Davis? Really, I feel sick just thinking of our bodies sweating together, but I'm going to have to choose him over Al Gore. I could never live with myself if I gave Al Gore an orgasm. He's the epitome of all things I dislike: liberal; green; hypocrite; ugly; free hand out giving; tree hugging; granola; and, self-promoting. There, I said it!

Have a great weekend! - xoxo, Maxi

Slow Walking Women - Sexy or Lazy?

Every morning when I get to work, I log on, grab my usual diet soda and read the news articles. Today I found this article http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,309436,00.html and would like to discuss.

First Cat and I discussed why this occurs. I came to the conclusion that it is because back in the Neanderthal days, men could smell fertile women through their pheromones so the less fertile women had to compensate so that the men would select them. It was survival of the fittest after all! In today’s society, with better hygiene, this isn’t as much as an issue, but the walk has continued to be a trait in these women.

There was a girl in my high school who I swear her hips rotated 280 degrees from side to side. If this study is true, poor thing doesn’t need to worry about getting pregnant. She’ll waste her single years worrying about birth control and condoms, and the married years worrying about when she’ll get pregnant.

Cat and my conversation quickly led to a girl in our office, we’ll call her SW from here on out (SW for slow walker). She walks so slowly through the office. I see it as meandering. To me, she looks lazy. She’s not in a hurry to get anything done. But she’s a good worker, let me tell you, she’s smart, knows her stuff, good work ethics, quick learner, etc., But I can’t help but think that her slow moving throughout the office is hindering the way her supervisors look at her. My mom told me a story about a guy in her office, who she swore never did an hour of work in his life. But he could always be found walking around the office at high speeds carrying binders. SW is the exact opposite of this guy. But I do think the speed at which you walk directly affects other’s perception of you. If you’re meandering around the office, people see you as not really excited about your work nor concered with deadlines. Plus, she types slowly. And if you go to her desk to ask a question, she slowly finishes her sentence, and slowly swivels around on the chair and slowly asks "what's up?" But that's off the topic of the slow walk.

OC calls it the “bitch” walk. That makes me laugh, because I never saw it like that. I guess to him it’s more of a strut. But the point is, women and men alike think it’s obnoxious.

So, we came to this final question. Does she have a "sexy" walk - as in rotating her hips? Or is it just sexy because it's slow? And how to others view the slow walk? Is it lazy, bitch, or sexy?

-Maxi

Random Friday Question - Do you believe in aliens?

I want to try to do this, so Cat, you better participate. Each Friday, one of us will come up with a random question. If we ever get any readers, they are welcome to participate as well in the comments section.

This week's random question is:

Do you believe in aliens?

I'd have to say yes on this one. But I don't think they're the glowy green ones. And I don't think they're trying to contact us. But yes, I do believe there is other life out there.

Random blog of the day

Spotted on the way to work today: A man, in a suit, wearing tennis shoes. For some reason, this really bothered me! I know women that do it all the time, heck I even have done it on occasion, but women's shoes pinch and have heels and are un-fucking-comfortable. Men, don't have the same excuse. I don't know if it was the fact they were greying white battered sneakers. Perhaps if he was wearing some hip dark sneakers, it would be okay. I don't know. Thoughts on this? Is this common? Am I the last to have seen this horror? Do others find it acceptable?

-Max