I know, I know, I have been ONE BAD BLOGGER lately. But like I said earlier, it’s because the novelty has worn off, and I haven’t had any matches that have excited me. I’ve been on for about a month now, and no real progress to speak of.
Let’s see here. I closed out matches for about a week now. I only have 15 “open” matches, of which I am communicating with 12. Some that I’m “communicating” with, I’d rather not. For example, one of the duds that I went into OC with turned out to be a super email dud. It was so hard to squeak any sort of response back to him, and I’m sure he could notice that because he hasn’t replied back to me either. Fun fat emailed me a while ago for the second time, I haven’t responded back, and he sent me another email today! Yikes! I couldn’t read it at work, so I will be interested in seeing what he has to say. The only one I’m somewhat excited about is the engineer. He is still just as cute and funny as ever. I wrote him a second email back yesterday. But the more I think about it, the more I wonder if it will work. He lives about 1 hour and 45 minutes away, and the more I think about this, the more I don’t think I can literally afford a long distance, driving every weekend relationship. First, the gas alone will send me to the poor house, secondly, when am I going to do anything on my house? I cannot, I repeat CANNOT neglect my house!
I’ll probably open matches up again, but I wanted to take a break, so to speak. Plus, there was the free weekend. Oh, radio guy commented back to my close message “I thought we had potential…” I think he must have been able to log on for the free weekend. He was the one that sent me his email address. Maybe I’ll shoot him an email, we’ll see.
Speaking of emails, I wanted to write a quick update on Major. I finally wrote him an email, (I spent lots of time making sure it wasn’t accusatory, or give him any ultimatums, etc.). Basically I said I was confused as to why he was calling me and wanting me to come out. I really couldn’t tell if it was because he was being nice or whether he really cared for me. I would have liked for us to maintain a relationship, but understand if he doesn’t, given his situation. I thought it was a well written email. He responded with telling me he cared very deeply for me, I helped him through a very rough time in his life. He would like to see me, that’s why he invited me out, but to talk about a future without seeing the whole picture would be premature. He definitely wanted me to come out, meet his daughter, see where he lives, etc. But with that all said, he indicated long distance relationships are tough. It was a very adult response, and he had a lot of valid points. But I don’t really know where I see this going now. I emailed him back and told him I had a lot to think about and would call him, but that was almost a week ago. I just don’t know what I want. I wish it could be easy and simple and he lived here, child and all. But I really don’t see how I can afford to fly out there, and he’s right, long distance relationships are hard, and they’re even harder if you can’t afford to see the person. So, I’m wondering if I just let us be as friends, and who knows, maybe in 6 months, a year’s time, things will be different and if it’s meant to be, then things will work out so that it is. But at least I feel good that I let him know how I felt, and I can’t ever be like “what if?”
Memorial Day weekend was really nice. Had a few cookouts Thursday through Sunday. Then Sunday, I headed to my parents where my parents, aunt, uncle and I went out on the boat on the lake. It was such an amazingly perfect day! I got some serious tan! Woo hoo! I am a sun lover 100%! I actually took work off on Tuesday as well and spent some extra time at the pool. Everyone was commenting about how tan I looked, and for those that know me, saying I look tan is just as good as saying I look skinny or pretty!
xoxo, Maxi
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
eHarmon-me: Day 24
Well, here we are... 24 days and Maxi finally entered into Open Communication! I had two outstanding messages since Monday, but I was too afraid to open them and see what they said. I don't know why I'm afraid. It reminds me again of C, who just chickened out altogether. It seems like it's becoming a possibility to meet someone (I don't meet as in "meet" but literally go out and meet someone in person). I read their messages and responded back. But let me tell you, it was really hard. It's really awkward once you're in open communication.
I'm at the stage with the engineer (and no, not on the railroad!) where I have to initiate open communication. But once again, I am really nervous. From what I can gather, he is really great and I'm really excited that I made it to this point with him. So far, we've had great banter in the 2nd questions, and he really is super witty and clever. I just know I want to meet him. I'm really stressing out though, I want to make my first email perfect, so I'm waiting while I think about it. I can't wait too long though, or he'll lose interest. But does anyone else get as stressed out in OC as me? The only problem is he lives far away. But I've been excited about this guy since they matched me up. I bet nothing happens though. Isn't that the way it always goes?
Another question I have, what's the average number of people that eHarmony users have in open communication at any time? It really was a lot harder to get to this point than I thought. I thought I'd be be-bopping all over this thing, which I was, just not be-bopping to OC. It was more of a be-bop straight to the dumping! haha!
Oh, and I have another question! I doubt any of these get answered, but I want to know the protocol. Do we reference eHarmony at all? I mean, in the OC, say something about how it's weird, or how about when/if you meet someone? Do you say something then? I don't know what the proper procedure is.
So many questions. And I'm about done with my first month!
21 current matches (15 in communication)
122 closed matches
I've received 7 matches every day that I've been able to receive them. Over the course of this month, I probably closed down for a total of about 7 or 8 days. Today, I got 9 matches. That was weird. I think I'll close down again. My new matches are not great. They've been really far away and have had less traits that I'm interested in. Besides, the more matches I receive, the more likely it is that I'll know one of them...yikes! But on the other hand, the more I get, the more likely one will be a real match. So, who knows. It's tough navigating this on your own. I really want to know what the people on the other side of the match are doing and thinking!
Tomorrow I have a game night/cook out at a friend's house, so either I won't have time to log on, or I'll be drunk and get into another EWI situation! haha! Better not communicate with anyone I care about if that's the case! Especially not in open communication!
xoxo, Maxi
I'm at the stage with the engineer (and no, not on the railroad!) where I have to initiate open communication. But once again, I am really nervous. From what I can gather, he is really great and I'm really excited that I made it to this point with him. So far, we've had great banter in the 2nd questions, and he really is super witty and clever. I just know I want to meet him. I'm really stressing out though, I want to make my first email perfect, so I'm waiting while I think about it. I can't wait too long though, or he'll lose interest. But does anyone else get as stressed out in OC as me? The only problem is he lives far away. But I've been excited about this guy since they matched me up. I bet nothing happens though. Isn't that the way it always goes?
Another question I have, what's the average number of people that eHarmony users have in open communication at any time? It really was a lot harder to get to this point than I thought. I thought I'd be be-bopping all over this thing, which I was, just not be-bopping to OC. It was more of a be-bop straight to the dumping! haha!
Oh, and I have another question! I doubt any of these get answered, but I want to know the protocol. Do we reference eHarmony at all? I mean, in the OC, say something about how it's weird, or how about when/if you meet someone? Do you say something then? I don't know what the proper procedure is.
So many questions. And I'm about done with my first month!
21 current matches (15 in communication)
122 closed matches
I've received 7 matches every day that I've been able to receive them. Over the course of this month, I probably closed down for a total of about 7 or 8 days. Today, I got 9 matches. That was weird. I think I'll close down again. My new matches are not great. They've been really far away and have had less traits that I'm interested in. Besides, the more matches I receive, the more likely it is that I'll know one of them...yikes! But on the other hand, the more I get, the more likely one will be a real match. So, who knows. It's tough navigating this on your own. I really want to know what the people on the other side of the match are doing and thinking!
Tomorrow I have a game night/cook out at a friend's house, so either I won't have time to log on, or I'll be drunk and get into another EWI situation! haha! Better not communicate with anyone I care about if that's the case! Especially not in open communication!
xoxo, Maxi
Saturday, May 17, 2008
eHarmon-me: Day 20
Nothing too much in the eHarmony world. I guess the initial infatuation has worn off, but I'm still on there, receiving matches, closing matches out, and communicating with some.
I thought I was about to enter into open communication (it's been over 2 weeks on eHarmony, and I have yet to make it to that stage yet, I guess just the timing back and forth) but I don't know what happened. I sent second questions, he answered, sent second questions. Then I clicked on "Read Dr. Warren's Message" and then it said "your message has been to sent to ____." I'm so confused without some explanation and details. That is something I really would like to change about eHarmony, is that they'd provide more details on how the communication process works. Fortunately, eHarmony Blog provided me on some insight (as in the person who does not initiate communication must be the first person to send MHCS, and second questions. But what's going on with the open communication. I didn't receive any message from Dr. Warren. Does the other person also have to select to read the message? I can't go anywhere now, when I click on "read Dr. Warren's message" it just says my message was sent to that person on May 15. I just really have no idea what's going on.
Secondly, I find that I'm losing guys at the open question stage. I'm not really sure why. Either I had to send questions first, or they sent to me, I answered and sent ones back, but that's when they're dropping off the face of the earth. I have a few outstanding ones that I'll take care of tomorrow, but it's a little confusing. Are my questions/answers THAT bad? Or is there some sort of glitch in the system? (At least that makes me sleep better at night, thinking it's the system).
So, two guys have been in communication with me that I am super excited about. They are both so funny and cute and I really like their answers and all that. But they are both soooo attractive and fit. This really concerns me. I'm just afraid they'll take one look at me and run. That really won't be too good for the old ego!
Here's my match update (I actually turned off matching this weekend because it's a free communication weekend, and I don't want any Joe Blow seeing me if they're not serious, or just want the free personality profile).
Current matches: 26
In communication: 13 of those above 26. 1 that initiated with me and I haven't responded yet, 5 that I need to do something, and 7 that I'm waiting for.
94 closed: 11 that closed me
One other thing I've learned, is that you shouldn't close someone out just because they hadn't responded yet (like I closed out the police officer after two weeks). You don't want to burn any bridges, because people fall off along the way. And if these people aren't responding because they're too busy, than that's okay. If it's because they aren't members anymore, who knows, they may join again. I haven't closed too many that I regret, but I do regret the police officer.
I have some good options that I'm communicating with right now. A lot of them live about an hour away though. I thought I was okay with that, but now, with the price of gas and the fact I'm always broke anyways, I might have to reconsider.
On a side note, I've been so stressed at work lately, and my face is showing it! Me, who never gets acne, has three zits right now! And it's the cystic acne kind (which if you ever get it, do not, under any circumstances, pop it! It will turn 100x worse) which is so bad, and just proves it's stress, and not that I'm not washing my face. Plus, I don't know if it's this new BC I switched too. I don't know why, but 2 months ago, I decided I wanted to try a new BC. I thought maybe a new one might help with my extra testosterone problem. But instead, all it's done is give me weird periods, and potentially is adding to my face problems. I need to call my doctor and go back to my original kind. The kind that's been true to me for over 5 years.
Well, I guess that's it for now. I'm heading off to get ready to go to Becca's bachelorette party tonight. Should be fun!
xoxo, Max
I thought I was about to enter into open communication (it's been over 2 weeks on eHarmony, and I have yet to make it to that stage yet, I guess just the timing back and forth) but I don't know what happened. I sent second questions, he answered, sent second questions. Then I clicked on "Read Dr. Warren's Message" and then it said "your message has been to sent to ____." I'm so confused without some explanation and details. That is something I really would like to change about eHarmony, is that they'd provide more details on how the communication process works. Fortunately, eHarmony Blog provided me on some insight (as in the person who does not initiate communication must be the first person to send MHCS, and second questions. But what's going on with the open communication. I didn't receive any message from Dr. Warren. Does the other person also have to select to read the message? I can't go anywhere now, when I click on "read Dr. Warren's message" it just says my message was sent to that person on May 15. I just really have no idea what's going on.
Secondly, I find that I'm losing guys at the open question stage. I'm not really sure why. Either I had to send questions first, or they sent to me, I answered and sent ones back, but that's when they're dropping off the face of the earth. I have a few outstanding ones that I'll take care of tomorrow, but it's a little confusing. Are my questions/answers THAT bad? Or is there some sort of glitch in the system? (At least that makes me sleep better at night, thinking it's the system).
So, two guys have been in communication with me that I am super excited about. They are both so funny and cute and I really like their answers and all that. But they are both soooo attractive and fit. This really concerns me. I'm just afraid they'll take one look at me and run. That really won't be too good for the old ego!
Here's my match update (I actually turned off matching this weekend because it's a free communication weekend, and I don't want any Joe Blow seeing me if they're not serious, or just want the free personality profile).
Current matches: 26
In communication: 13 of those above 26. 1 that initiated with me and I haven't responded yet, 5 that I need to do something, and 7 that I'm waiting for.
94 closed: 11 that closed me
One other thing I've learned, is that you shouldn't close someone out just because they hadn't responded yet (like I closed out the police officer after two weeks). You don't want to burn any bridges, because people fall off along the way. And if these people aren't responding because they're too busy, than that's okay. If it's because they aren't members anymore, who knows, they may join again. I haven't closed too many that I regret, but I do regret the police officer.
I have some good options that I'm communicating with right now. A lot of them live about an hour away though. I thought I was okay with that, but now, with the price of gas and the fact I'm always broke anyways, I might have to reconsider.
On a side note, I've been so stressed at work lately, and my face is showing it! Me, who never gets acne, has three zits right now! And it's the cystic acne kind (which if you ever get it, do not, under any circumstances, pop it! It will turn 100x worse) which is so bad, and just proves it's stress, and not that I'm not washing my face. Plus, I don't know if it's this new BC I switched too. I don't know why, but 2 months ago, I decided I wanted to try a new BC. I thought maybe a new one might help with my extra testosterone problem. But instead, all it's done is give me weird periods, and potentially is adding to my face problems. I need to call my doctor and go back to my original kind. The kind that's been true to me for over 5 years.
Well, I guess that's it for now. I'm heading off to get ready to go to Becca's bachelorette party tonight. Should be fun!
xoxo, Max
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
eHarmon-me: Day17
Just got off the phone with my friend E's friend C. We had a very long discussion about E's "boyfriend," how we both hate him, he makes people uncomfortable because of the rude things he says about E (in front of us), and how rude and straight up mean he is to her. And we don't know if it's that she doesn't care, or doesn't know, but it's really sad how she has all these excuses for why he treats her so mean. "I deserve it." I CANNOT believe she said that! That really is the sign of an abusive relationship when you start believing the terrible things the abuser says. C and I are really close to calling an intervention!
C and I were talking, because I finally told E how I felt. C's been wanting to say something for years, and now feels like she can, since I broke the ice. But this is what was interesting, she said "I always feel like I can't say something about some one's boyfriend unless I have a boyfriend, because they'll just think I'm jealous." And she really hit the nail on the head. It doesn't matter that the guy treats you poorly, or that he doesn't have a job, or is an alcoholic, or is married, or is just a straight up douche-bag loser, you don't like him because you're jealous. People in relationships can be so self-righteous!
Well, anyways, the point is, after we talked about not having boyfriends, I made a joke about how I was about ready to sign up for eHarmony (as of now, only Cat knows, and she's been sworn to blood sister secrecy!). Turns out C signed up for eHarmony earlier this year, and she regaled me of her experience! Turns out, it was very similar to mine. She got tons of matches, tons of communications, a few closes, and zero dates. Well, actually, she ended up deleting out her photos and profile information and basically chickening out, but her stories were so classic! She actually even had gone out with someone previously that she got matched up with. He closed her out pronto with "other." C said "I guess 'I already went out with and slept with her' wasn't an option!" Haha! Anyways, she said she was so paranoid on her way to work. If anyone even looked at her "did they get matched up with me and dump me?" "Do they recognize me and think 'geez, she looks so much better in her picture?'" I mean, it is EXACTLY what I had joked about with Cat. She thinks she might sign back up again, and this time take it seriously. Oh, one more thing she mentioned, was the matches getting out of control. Like me, she said there were just too many. One day, she actually had to go in and close out 85 of them to get her matches under control. But it was shortly thereafter that she was just too chicken and overwhelmed, that she just closed everything out.
So, even though C does not know that I signed up, I took her testimony to heart, and went in and closed out everyone! And I mean everyone! I have only 16 active matches right now. I even closed out police officer and no picture/now picture because it's been about 2 weeks with no response from them. I also closed out 5 of the 7 matches I received today. I now have 76 closed matches! But I feel good. I feel like I cleaned up a lot of the riff raff. And by riff raff, I mean those that are not active profiles and those that I'm not interested in. Unfortunately there were a few cute ones, but hey, they're gone now! Then, in the spirit of cleaning everything up, I made my communication with all those that were outstanding. I even sent second questions to a few guys, and I actually have second questions from a few as well. This is getting serious folks, the time for open communication is almost upon us. I can see why C chickened out. I don't know if I can do it. Can I actually meet someone at the trite Starbucks and order a tall soy, double espresso, light latte? (I actually don't drink coffee, so what am I going to have, a diet coke? Please.). But let's be honest for a second, Maxi needs booze on a first date. I can't be meeting someone on Sunday afternoon for a coffee. I need to get happy hour drinks after work to loosen up a little.
Back to my current communications. I think one of the guys I'm about to get into open communication with is serious! Let me post some items from his profile:
30 and in the one of the Armed Forces (one thing I learned from Major, military men are serious family guys).
"...can't wait until my own family is my absolute passion."
"I am looking for a woman that completes me"-this one actually makes me gag
"Relationships are really important to me"
His MH - "I must have someone who shares my desire to have or adopt children."
Maxi is nervous here guys. I think we have another Gorilla Arms (a guy that used to work in my office and was like "have job, have 4 bedroom suburban family home, enter wife, 2.5 kids, and dog here" Wait, actually, he already had a dog) on our hands here. I know I'm probably getting way ahead of myself here. Chances are pretty good that either a) we'll never meet, b) we will meet but he won't be up for boozing on the first night, and will be turned off that that's what I want, c) he'll take one look at me and be like "Um, what part of 'I enjoy being physically fit' made you think I'll date someone who needs to drop a quick 40?' or d) "it" just won't be there if we do meet. One thing I love is to worry about things that most likely never happen (was that on my eHarmony questionnaire?)
I'm logging off for now. Have a great night, and I'll talk to you tomorrow.
xoxo, Maxine
C and I were talking, because I finally told E how I felt. C's been wanting to say something for years, and now feels like she can, since I broke the ice. But this is what was interesting, she said "I always feel like I can't say something about some one's boyfriend unless I have a boyfriend, because they'll just think I'm jealous." And she really hit the nail on the head. It doesn't matter that the guy treats you poorly, or that he doesn't have a job, or is an alcoholic, or is married, or is just a straight up douche-bag loser, you don't like him because you're jealous. People in relationships can be so self-righteous!
Well, anyways, the point is, after we talked about not having boyfriends, I made a joke about how I was about ready to sign up for eHarmony (as of now, only Cat knows, and she's been sworn to blood sister secrecy!). Turns out C signed up for eHarmony earlier this year, and she regaled me of her experience! Turns out, it was very similar to mine. She got tons of matches, tons of communications, a few closes, and zero dates. Well, actually, she ended up deleting out her photos and profile information and basically chickening out, but her stories were so classic! She actually even had gone out with someone previously that she got matched up with. He closed her out pronto with "other." C said "I guess 'I already went out with and slept with her' wasn't an option!" Haha! Anyways, she said she was so paranoid on her way to work. If anyone even looked at her "did they get matched up with me and dump me?" "Do they recognize me and think 'geez, she looks so much better in her picture?'" I mean, it is EXACTLY what I had joked about with Cat. She thinks she might sign back up again, and this time take it seriously. Oh, one more thing she mentioned, was the matches getting out of control. Like me, she said there were just too many. One day, she actually had to go in and close out 85 of them to get her matches under control. But it was shortly thereafter that she was just too chicken and overwhelmed, that she just closed everything out.
So, even though C does not know that I signed up, I took her testimony to heart, and went in and closed out everyone! And I mean everyone! I have only 16 active matches right now. I even closed out police officer and no picture/now picture because it's been about 2 weeks with no response from them. I also closed out 5 of the 7 matches I received today. I now have 76 closed matches! But I feel good. I feel like I cleaned up a lot of the riff raff. And by riff raff, I mean those that are not active profiles and those that I'm not interested in. Unfortunately there were a few cute ones, but hey, they're gone now! Then, in the spirit of cleaning everything up, I made my communication with all those that were outstanding. I even sent second questions to a few guys, and I actually have second questions from a few as well. This is getting serious folks, the time for open communication is almost upon us. I can see why C chickened out. I don't know if I can do it. Can I actually meet someone at the trite Starbucks and order a tall soy, double espresso, light latte? (I actually don't drink coffee, so what am I going to have, a diet coke? Please.). But let's be honest for a second, Maxi needs booze on a first date. I can't be meeting someone on Sunday afternoon for a coffee. I need to get happy hour drinks after work to loosen up a little.
Back to my current communications. I think one of the guys I'm about to get into open communication with is serious! Let me post some items from his profile:
30 and in the one of the Armed Forces (one thing I learned from Major, military men are serious family guys).
"...can't wait until my own family is my absolute passion."
"I am looking for a woman that completes me"-this one actually makes me gag
"Relationships are really important to me"
His MH - "I must have someone who shares my desire to have or adopt children."
Maxi is nervous here guys. I think we have another Gorilla Arms (a guy that used to work in my office and was like "have job, have 4 bedroom suburban family home, enter wife, 2.5 kids, and dog here" Wait, actually, he already had a dog) on our hands here. I know I'm probably getting way ahead of myself here. Chances are pretty good that either a) we'll never meet, b) we will meet but he won't be up for boozing on the first night, and will be turned off that that's what I want, c) he'll take one look at me and be like "Um, what part of 'I enjoy being physically fit' made you think I'll date someone who needs to drop a quick 40?' or d) "it" just won't be there if we do meet. One thing I love is to worry about things that most likely never happen (was that on my eHarmony questionnaire?)
I'm logging off for now. Have a great night, and I'll talk to you tomorrow.
xoxo, Maxine
Monday, May 12, 2008
eHarmon-me: Day 16
Well, here it is, a little over 2 weeks, and no dates, nothing even too exciting. I have tons of open communication, some that I'm excited about, some, I'm not. More that I've closed, some (around 5) that have closed me. I'm starting to wonder if I'll even get 1 date out of this 3-month subscription.
Any thoughts on this? What's better... To be rejected from the get-go, or to go through a few stages, then reject?
I'm trying not to be close minded, but I feel like there's a difference between not thinking someone is "hot," and just getting that creepy feeling of just pure unattraction. Those are the ones I'm closing out. In fact, I will let you know, I have left several open and am communicating with some that I don't find overly attractive (watch one of them be the one I marry! haha), but they didn't give me that instant creep vibe. To some extent, you have to be attracted to your partner, regardless of what's on the inside, and if someone makes you vomit a bit inside when you look at their picture (and honestly, some that gave me this feeling were by society standards "attractive"). I think that's one thing I've definitely learned through this process, is that attraction to someone is an instant feeling you get when you look at them. And I think you shouldn't be repulsed when you look at someone. I know that sounds terribly bitchy and shallow, but in my defense, there are some ugly people out there that I don't get repulsed by. It's just an instant feeling that you get, and I think that is important. Actually, the more I think about this, I think the Date Doctor that I saw a few months ago said something to that effect. I don't remember what all he said, but that attraction was what made you want to talk to someone, and chemistry is what keeps you talking to someone. I guess eHarmony is trying to say all these people they match you with, you should have "chemistry" with, now you just have to find the ones that you are attracted to.
The more I am on eHarmony, the more I hate people that don't post pictures. Okay, it's fine if you hold off for a little while, but if you are initiating the conversation, then show your pictures!
Ok, so today I actually got 8 matches. 3 of these 8 started communication. One had a son, and I think I'm really thankful that Major showed me not to discard someone because they were divorced and had kids. That definitely used to be a deal breaker, and I think I'm more open to it now, and that's especially important with the whole eHarmony thing, were you shouldn't just close people off because of one trait (even though I did just expound on the whole looks thing and just closing out left and right, haha). I did close out one. Gosh, I love the "I think the physical distance is to great." I did close someone else out I was talking to due to their response "...everyone needs there..." Ugh.
So, here's the update:
32 current matches
18 in communication (out of those 32)
53 closed.
So, I have received 85 matches, and have closed over 60% of them. I guess that sounds about right. If not more should be closed out. I think out of every 10 people you see, maybe you're only really attracted to 2 of them. Uh oh, does that mean I need to go in and close out 15 of those that are left? Because I could easily do that!
Something else I've learned through this process, is you don't have to go out with everyone. I guess for the past few years, I've gone out with just about anyone who asks me out. I always figured "how are you going to know unless you give them a chance?" But this is the difference, you know straight up if there's something about the guy that you just aren't going to like, and you don't have to go out with them to find out whatever it is. I do like this about eHarmony. Otherwise, I might almost bet that I'd go out with all 85 of my matches (well, only 80, 5 did close me out).
xoxo, Maxi
Any thoughts on this? What's better... To be rejected from the get-go, or to go through a few stages, then reject?
I'm trying not to be close minded, but I feel like there's a difference between not thinking someone is "hot," and just getting that creepy feeling of just pure unattraction. Those are the ones I'm closing out. In fact, I will let you know, I have left several open and am communicating with some that I don't find overly attractive (watch one of them be the one I marry! haha), but they didn't give me that instant creep vibe. To some extent, you have to be attracted to your partner, regardless of what's on the inside, and if someone makes you vomit a bit inside when you look at their picture (and honestly, some that gave me this feeling were by society standards "attractive"). I think that's one thing I've definitely learned through this process, is that attraction to someone is an instant feeling you get when you look at them. And I think you shouldn't be repulsed when you look at someone. I know that sounds terribly bitchy and shallow, but in my defense, there are some ugly people out there that I don't get repulsed by. It's just an instant feeling that you get, and I think that is important. Actually, the more I think about this, I think the Date Doctor that I saw a few months ago said something to that effect. I don't remember what all he said, but that attraction was what made you want to talk to someone, and chemistry is what keeps you talking to someone. I guess eHarmony is trying to say all these people they match you with, you should have "chemistry" with, now you just have to find the ones that you are attracted to.
The more I am on eHarmony, the more I hate people that don't post pictures. Okay, it's fine if you hold off for a little while, but if you are initiating the conversation, then show your pictures!
Ok, so today I actually got 8 matches. 3 of these 8 started communication. One had a son, and I think I'm really thankful that Major showed me not to discard someone because they were divorced and had kids. That definitely used to be a deal breaker, and I think I'm more open to it now, and that's especially important with the whole eHarmony thing, were you shouldn't just close people off because of one trait (even though I did just expound on the whole looks thing and just closing out left and right, haha). I did close out one. Gosh, I love the "I think the physical distance is to great." I did close someone else out I was talking to due to their response "...everyone needs there..." Ugh.
So, here's the update:
32 current matches
18 in communication (out of those 32)
53 closed.
So, I have received 85 matches, and have closed over 60% of them. I guess that sounds about right. If not more should be closed out. I think out of every 10 people you see, maybe you're only really attracted to 2 of them. Uh oh, does that mean I need to go in and close out 15 of those that are left? Because I could easily do that!
Something else I've learned through this process, is you don't have to go out with everyone. I guess for the past few years, I've gone out with just about anyone who asks me out. I always figured "how are you going to know unless you give them a chance?" But this is the difference, you know straight up if there's something about the guy that you just aren't going to like, and you don't have to go out with them to find out whatever it is. I do like this about eHarmony. Otherwise, I might almost bet that I'd go out with all 85 of my matches (well, only 80, 5 did close me out).
xoxo, Maxi
Thursday, May 8, 2008
eHarmon-me: Day 11
In the harsh light of reality (aka the computer screen), I logged back into eHarmony to see what mess Cat and I had made last night.
22 current matches - 7 of which were new matches today.
12 of whom I am in communication with - only 3 of which Cat and I initiated last night, so that's not as bad as I originally feared.
34 of which are closed.
I'm not going to do any answering or anything like that tonight, I need to decide if I'm going to visit Coach or not. So, check this, he conveniently forgot to tell me he has a roommate at the hotel! Please, I am too old. I told him "no, no way, sorry but no." And he got really upset. I can't believe he thinks I'm going to go when he has a roommate! Seriously! Anyways, so I am going to look and see how much rooms are and debate whether he's worth it. Point being, I may or may not log back in, depending on whether I see Coach or not.
And for the record, no, I do not need to get laid that badly!
xoxo, Maxi
22 current matches - 7 of which were new matches today.
12 of whom I am in communication with - only 3 of which Cat and I initiated last night, so that's not as bad as I originally feared.
34 of which are closed.
I'm not going to do any answering or anything like that tonight, I need to decide if I'm going to visit Coach or not. So, check this, he conveniently forgot to tell me he has a roommate at the hotel! Please, I am too old. I told him "no, no way, sorry but no." And he got really upset. I can't believe he thinks I'm going to go when he has a roommate! Seriously! Anyways, so I am going to look and see how much rooms are and debate whether he's worth it. Point being, I may or may not log back in, depending on whether I see Coach or not.
And for the record, no, I do not need to get laid that badly!
xoxo, Maxi
EWI
I have been charged with eHarmony-ing While Intoxicated!
Yesterday, we had a work happy hour from 4 to 6. Cat and I stayed until about 8, then came over to my house to have wine and look at eHarmony! I was glad for Cat to finally see everyone and just get a feel for the site. Since Cat had nothing to lose, and since I was highly buzzing, we went to town on all my matches, either starting communication, responding to communication, or closing everyone out. As of yesterday, I had 49 ...
Ok, I have to break my usual post with a news update! Last night, after happy hour, Cat and I came into the office to put the extra food away, and apparently OC was still here! The whole office was dark, and we were talking very loudly. OC's cube is right next to the kitchen. This morning, OC made a comment about something we said last night, so I know he was here. I don't know what all he heard, I don't remember how long we were in the office, but Cat and I are both extremely embarrassed because I'm sure we were talking about personal stuff. I'm sure I mentioned eHarmony. Shit Shit Shit! He won't tell us what all he knows, but Cat and I both freaked out when we found out. We may have even said something about him! I mean, I can't even describe the true fear I feel right now that our dirty laundry is going to be airing all over the office. No, OC's not like that, but still, if he knows I'm on eHarmony...If he knows who Cat's crush at the office is...if he knows who my crush is...did we talk about sex? Probably! This is bad, very very bad!
Ok, back to the regularly scheduled blog...I had 49 matches, and I think we closed out about 35 of them. I did get 7 new matches yesterday. They weren't that great, but they were tall, which is an improvement. I think I closed all of them out! Haha! Just things they said in their profile, and like I said, Cat was ruthless. I already got 7 more this morning, and what's peculiar is two, both from today, are brewery engineers. I just think it's weird that I get a lot of these people that have the same jobs, like the College Administrator. I still don't even know what that means. Anyways, this morning, some of the guys wrote back already. I can't log on until I get home, so I'll just have to be in suspense all day!
On a side note though, Coach is going to be relatively in town this weekend. I guess there's a AAU basketball tournament in a city about 1 hour away and he's going as a recruiting even. Of course he wants to meet up. I'm not sure how I feel about this. I know he's going to want to sleep with me. A lot of the same feelings I felt when I went up to visit him for NYE are coming back. I probably will see him, but it's going to be like me driving there, just to spend the night, just to drive back the next day. Is it even worth it? And am I leading him on? Does this make me a slut? Just going to him for booty? I mean, at least my number doesn't go up, but... Am I going to be upset afterwards? And what about Major? Will it be like he never even happened? I know I'm way over thinking all this, but that's what I do.
Major did call last night, as usual. But by this point, I don't really need the phone calls anymore. I wonder why he's still calling.
xoxo, Maxi
Yesterday, we had a work happy hour from 4 to 6. Cat and I stayed until about 8, then came over to my house to have wine and look at eHarmony! I was glad for Cat to finally see everyone and just get a feel for the site. Since Cat had nothing to lose, and since I was highly buzzing, we went to town on all my matches, either starting communication, responding to communication, or closing everyone out. As of yesterday, I had 49 ...
Ok, I have to break my usual post with a news update! Last night, after happy hour, Cat and I came into the office to put the extra food away, and apparently OC was still here! The whole office was dark, and we were talking very loudly. OC's cube is right next to the kitchen. This morning, OC made a comment about something we said last night, so I know he was here. I don't know what all he heard, I don't remember how long we were in the office, but Cat and I are both extremely embarrassed because I'm sure we were talking about personal stuff. I'm sure I mentioned eHarmony. Shit Shit Shit! He won't tell us what all he knows, but Cat and I both freaked out when we found out. We may have even said something about him! I mean, I can't even describe the true fear I feel right now that our dirty laundry is going to be airing all over the office. No, OC's not like that, but still, if he knows I'm on eHarmony...If he knows who Cat's crush at the office is...if he knows who my crush is...did we talk about sex? Probably! This is bad, very very bad!
Ok, back to the regularly scheduled blog...I had 49 matches, and I think we closed out about 35 of them. I did get 7 new matches yesterday. They weren't that great, but they were tall, which is an improvement. I think I closed all of them out! Haha! Just things they said in their profile, and like I said, Cat was ruthless. I already got 7 more this morning, and what's peculiar is two, both from today, are brewery engineers. I just think it's weird that I get a lot of these people that have the same jobs, like the College Administrator. I still don't even know what that means. Anyways, this morning, some of the guys wrote back already. I can't log on until I get home, so I'll just have to be in suspense all day!
On a side note though, Coach is going to be relatively in town this weekend. I guess there's a AAU basketball tournament in a city about 1 hour away and he's going as a recruiting even. Of course he wants to meet up. I'm not sure how I feel about this. I know he's going to want to sleep with me. A lot of the same feelings I felt when I went up to visit him for NYE are coming back. I probably will see him, but it's going to be like me driving there, just to spend the night, just to drive back the next day. Is it even worth it? And am I leading him on? Does this make me a slut? Just going to him for booty? I mean, at least my number doesn't go up, but... Am I going to be upset afterwards? And what about Major? Will it be like he never even happened? I know I'm way over thinking all this, but that's what I do.
Major did call last night, as usual. But by this point, I don't really need the phone calls anymore. I wonder why he's still calling.
xoxo, Maxi
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
I'm one brazen eHarmony Hussy!
Haha, not really, but I just wanted to log back in real quick to write this update. I initiated conversation with someone! Haha! There we go! I made the first move. There was just something about his profile. So, we shall see. Plus, this will answer a lot of my other questions about the communication process. If he sends questions back, will I be able to send MHCS, or does he (as I felt like I had to when they guy initiated). So many questions!! Why is this so stressful!!?
I wonder if he's not active anymore, does he still get updates saying communication wants to talk to him?
I wonder if he's not active anymore, does he still get updates saying communication wants to talk to him?
eHarmon-me: Day 10
This morning, everything was back to normal, my inbox was filled with 7 new matches, and one request for communication. These matches were all pretty normal. I wasn't thrilled with the location though, only 2 lived in the city that I did, the rest were 30 minutes to 3 hours away!
While I was bee bopping around on eHarmony, apparently a match closed me out! I went to the "communicating" matches, and one said "read closed message." I don't know how long it was there. I didn't receive an email, and it wasn't on an update or anything like that when I logged on. It wasn't that big of a loss, he was 5'8", which means he was probably 5'6", but he was okay other than that. If he had initiated something, I probably would have responded.
Oh, and I didn't get an option to send him a good bye message back, so there goes that theory about those other guys not being active members, that's why they didn't send the good bye message back. But since I actively closed him out, does he get an email like "Match received communication" letting him know I closed him out, but that's it? So many questions!!! And really, the only way to know is to be communicating online with someone you talk to in real life!
So, I wrote questions back to no picture/now picture guy. Still no word from police officer. I can only imagine he's pursuing some other girl now, or his subscription expired. That's too bad. Makes me kind of sad.
In other news, my TV is still on the fritz. I put in a DVD and that sounds fine, so it's definitely the cable. I don't have time to have the cable guy come out here. On one hand I think it's good it's out so I can do some work, which I need to do. But don't worry, I got my Hills in last night, I went over to Cheer's house, so that crisis was averted!
And just as a side note, comments from random people are MORE than welcome!
Open matches: 24
Communicating: 8
Ones that I'm actually communicating back with: 4
Closed: 18
Total Matches Received: 42
xoxo, Maxi
While I was bee bopping around on eHarmony, apparently a match closed me out! I went to the "communicating" matches, and one said "read closed message." I don't know how long it was there. I didn't receive an email, and it wasn't on an update or anything like that when I logged on. It wasn't that big of a loss, he was 5'8", which means he was probably 5'6", but he was okay other than that. If he had initiated something, I probably would have responded.
Oh, and I didn't get an option to send him a good bye message back, so there goes that theory about those other guys not being active members, that's why they didn't send the good bye message back. But since I actively closed him out, does he get an email like "Match received communication" letting him know I closed him out, but that's it? So many questions!!! And really, the only way to know is to be communicating online with someone you talk to in real life!
So, I wrote questions back to no picture/now picture guy. Still no word from police officer. I can only imagine he's pursuing some other girl now, or his subscription expired. That's too bad. Makes me kind of sad.
In other news, my TV is still on the fritz. I put in a DVD and that sounds fine, so it's definitely the cable. I don't have time to have the cable guy come out here. On one hand I think it's good it's out so I can do some work, which I need to do. But don't worry, I got my Hills in last night, I went over to Cheer's house, so that crisis was averted!
And just as a side note, comments from random people are MORE than welcome!
Open matches: 24
Communicating: 8
Ones that I'm actually communicating back with: 4
Closed: 18
Total Matches Received: 42
xoxo, Maxi
Monday, May 5, 2008
eHarmon-me: Day 9
I think it's day 9 anyways...
Let me start off by saying how much of a cliche I feel like right now. I'm sitting at home, in mismatched PJ's, freshly scrubbed face, hair in a ponytail, eating a lean cuisine for dinner, blogging, and checking eHarmony. If I'm not the poster child for stereotypical single white female, then I don't know what is...oh wait, I think I need to get a cat.
Anyways, let me start off with some super exciting news! My shed was demolished today! I hired some guy for $300 to come and tear it down. Since the city will haul away for free, I just needed him to stack it neatly in the back. My new shed is coming Wednesday, but I need my dad to come into town to help me put it up, so right now, I have a huge dirt spot in my back yard, and all my tools, lawn mower, etc., sitting on my back porch. But the point is, I am well on my way to having that shed gone from my life! Like it never existed to begin with!
In other exciting news, I saw MK at lunch today, and for the very first time, was able to glance at his left hand which DEFINITELY did NOT have a wedding band on! That was all that happened. I saw him eating his lunch in the courtyard. He was looking mighty fine in his suit, but of course, there was no interaction. Unfortunately I didn't see him until after Cat and I sat down, or else, I'd have chosen to sit near him, so that we could strike up some friendly banter. Or maybe it's best I didn't sit next to him, so I can pretend he would have talked to me. Now, I'll never know. Gee, I really am a freshman in love with the senior quarterback!
Ok, time for the eHarmony update! Today was the first time I've logged in since Thursday.
Still no word from the police officer! I can't believe it! Is he rejecting me??!!! I guess now I understand why people get insulted when they get rejected before the person even gets to know them, but I guess that is the problem with online dating. I almost feel like you get rejected more often online than you would in real life. But anyways, maybe he's really busy. Maybe it's legit. Maybe he's playing the game too. What I like to think is he's taking the time to answer my awesome questions with perfect answers, and then think of fabulous questions for me! And I'm clinging to that. De'Nile isn't just some river in Egypt my friends!
Ok, back to the other guys. I received some answers from one guy, but it took him about a week to answer. Then, the guy with no picture sent his MHCS back to me. His picture finally appeared. He's actually pretty cute. Very GQ, very manly, beefy, just the way I like them! But I guess now I have to write him some second questions.
Oh, and Radio answered my questions, but in one of them he wrote "Hey Maxi, nice getting to know you, but my eHarmony subscription is going to end in a few days. If you'd like to email me, it's _____." Of course I immediately tried to find him on myspace, but to no avail. Anyways, I don't know what I think about that. Interesting.
I still have some outstanding communications, but now that I know they never remove your profile, I think I just won't answer, and have the guys think I'm no longer active. Then, they can close me out, and I don't have to feel badly anymore for closing out people left and right.
And last, but not least, I turned matching back to on. I was surprised they didn't immediately send me matches, but we'll see what I have tomorrow, if anything.
I think I'll think of some great questions for no picture/now has picture guy, see what people think about Radio, and hope for the best with police officer. The other guy, I think I'll wait a few days, then send him my MHCS.
I wish eHarmony would tell you the last time someone logged on.
Oh! So, my TV isn't working, or something! I just tried to turn it on (only adding to the SWF stereotype, maybe I need to get some ice cream too). And my volume is coming in terribly, like the speaker blew out. But when I turn cable off and just turn to regular TV, it's fine. I am SOOOOOOOOO pissed right now! Where am I going to watch "The Hills??" Agh! I am starting to FREAK OUT!!!
$#%^*@!, Maxi
Let me start off by saying how much of a cliche I feel like right now. I'm sitting at home, in mismatched PJ's, freshly scrubbed face, hair in a ponytail, eating a lean cuisine for dinner, blogging, and checking eHarmony. If I'm not the poster child for stereotypical single white female, then I don't know what is...oh wait, I think I need to get a cat.
Anyways, let me start off with some super exciting news! My shed was demolished today! I hired some guy for $300 to come and tear it down. Since the city will haul away for free, I just needed him to stack it neatly in the back. My new shed is coming Wednesday, but I need my dad to come into town to help me put it up, so right now, I have a huge dirt spot in my back yard, and all my tools, lawn mower, etc., sitting on my back porch. But the point is, I am well on my way to having that shed gone from my life! Like it never existed to begin with!
In other exciting news, I saw MK at lunch today, and for the very first time, was able to glance at his left hand which DEFINITELY did NOT have a wedding band on! That was all that happened. I saw him eating his lunch in the courtyard. He was looking mighty fine in his suit, but of course, there was no interaction. Unfortunately I didn't see him until after Cat and I sat down, or else, I'd have chosen to sit near him, so that we could strike up some friendly banter. Or maybe it's best I didn't sit next to him, so I can pretend he would have talked to me. Now, I'll never know. Gee, I really am a freshman in love with the senior quarterback!
Ok, time for the eHarmony update! Today was the first time I've logged in since Thursday.
Still no word from the police officer! I can't believe it! Is he rejecting me??!!! I guess now I understand why people get insulted when they get rejected before the person even gets to know them, but I guess that is the problem with online dating. I almost feel like you get rejected more often online than you would in real life. But anyways, maybe he's really busy. Maybe it's legit. Maybe he's playing the game too. What I like to think is he's taking the time to answer my awesome questions with perfect answers, and then think of fabulous questions for me! And I'm clinging to that. De'Nile isn't just some river in Egypt my friends!
Ok, back to the other guys. I received some answers from one guy, but it took him about a week to answer. Then, the guy with no picture sent his MHCS back to me. His picture finally appeared. He's actually pretty cute. Very GQ, very manly, beefy, just the way I like them! But I guess now I have to write him some second questions.
Oh, and Radio answered my questions, but in one of them he wrote "Hey Maxi, nice getting to know you, but my eHarmony subscription is going to end in a few days. If you'd like to email me, it's _____." Of course I immediately tried to find him on myspace, but to no avail. Anyways, I don't know what I think about that. Interesting.
I still have some outstanding communications, but now that I know they never remove your profile, I think I just won't answer, and have the guys think I'm no longer active. Then, they can close me out, and I don't have to feel badly anymore for closing out people left and right.
And last, but not least, I turned matching back to on. I was surprised they didn't immediately send me matches, but we'll see what I have tomorrow, if anything.
I think I'll think of some great questions for no picture/now has picture guy, see what people think about Radio, and hope for the best with police officer. The other guy, I think I'll wait a few days, then send him my MHCS.
I wish eHarmony would tell you the last time someone logged on.
Oh! So, my TV isn't working, or something! I just tried to turn it on (only adding to the SWF stereotype, maybe I need to get some ice cream too). And my volume is coming in terribly, like the speaker blew out. But when I turn cable off and just turn to regular TV, it's fine. I am SOOOOOOOOO pissed right now! Where am I going to watch "The Hills??" Agh! I am starting to FREAK OUT!!!
$#%^*@!, Maxi
Sunday, May 4, 2008
eHarmony Weekend Update
Cat, in all her infinite wisdom, decided we needed to blog in different colors, you know, because she writes so many posts. But here's my color. It may not always be this exact color, but I'll be in the blue family, and she'll be in the red.
Today I just wanted to catch up with the eHarmony weekend happenings. First, I decided not to log onto to eHarmony all weekend. Everyone who knows me, knows I love rules, and that's what I decided a rule for me was. No logging on, or answering questions, etc. on the weekend. And since I was pretty busy, it was pretty easy.
I got two communications Friday while I was at work, and now I'm at the point where the next step is for me to send them both my must haves/can't stands. I haven't heard back from the police officer, but that's okay, maybe he plays by the same weekend rules. So, I had no updates all weekend since I was waiting for police officer, and everyone else is waiting for me.
I did do a little Internet researching and discovered that eHarmony does not remove profiles. So, once you're done, before your subscription expires, you need to delete everything from your account. I certainly don't want my profile out there when I don't know who's receiving it. So, this was good to know. Additionally, it makes sense why out of my matches, over half never viewed me, nor responded. Also, out of all the ones I closed, only one responded with the "good luck on your search." (I'm not sure if there are other options available since I've never received one, nor had anyone close me out). I bet these people are not active matches. I think when I log on later tonight, I'll turn my receive matches back to on, because out of my 35 matches (remembering I turned matches off a few days ago), I think only 13 are active members. I would like the police officer to respond though.
In other weekend news, on Saturday, I went to a baby shower. It's for a girl that I'm not super close with, but like, so I agreed to go. Thursday, I get a frantic call from the girl hosting the shower saying "Please don't bail on Saturday!" Apparently, no one RSVP'd to the shower. On Wednesday, she called the girl for whom the shower was for to see if anyone RSVP'd to her, because apparently I was the only one who did. No, that was it, just me, the girl having the baby, and the girl throwing the shower. I feel terrible. That is so sad. Who are these people that don't know how to RSVP one way or the other? I just was appalled by how rude some people are. I felt bad, it was going to take her two seconds to open our gifts, but on the bright side, I didn't have to play any "Guess How Big Mommy Is" games. Also, I always get a giant box of diapers as my gift. That's my thing. Most people get little clothes and cute things, because they are more fun to buy. But half the time, most of those things don't even get worn because the baby out grows them. At 10 diapers a day, I've decided diapers are the way to go, and are usually the most appreciated gift. Albeit, not the cutest, or most fun. No one is gooing and gawing when the mom opens a box of 200 Huggies, but I've always heard great feed back. Well, since there weren't a lot of people there at the shower, I did feel bad that she wouldn't have any cute things to open, but my gift was already bought, and I certainly wasn't going back into Babies R Us for fear that I might get pregnant just being around all those women and babies! The girl throwing the shower, went out and bought a ton of gifts, and wrapped them all separately so the girl would have a lot of presents to open. That girl has a heart of gold, I tell you. I mean, usually the shower is the gift.
I guess that's it. I may post again when I log on tonight. My rule was no eHarmony all day Friday -Sunday at 7pm. So, we'll see if I have any updates by that time.
xoxo, Maxine
Today I just wanted to catch up with the eHarmony weekend happenings. First, I decided not to log onto to eHarmony all weekend. Everyone who knows me, knows I love rules, and that's what I decided a rule for me was. No logging on, or answering questions, etc. on the weekend. And since I was pretty busy, it was pretty easy.
I got two communications Friday while I was at work, and now I'm at the point where the next step is for me to send them both my must haves/can't stands. I haven't heard back from the police officer, but that's okay, maybe he plays by the same weekend rules. So, I had no updates all weekend since I was waiting for police officer, and everyone else is waiting for me.
I did do a little Internet researching and discovered that eHarmony does not remove profiles. So, once you're done, before your subscription expires, you need to delete everything from your account. I certainly don't want my profile out there when I don't know who's receiving it. So, this was good to know. Additionally, it makes sense why out of my matches, over half never viewed me, nor responded. Also, out of all the ones I closed, only one responded with the "good luck on your search." (I'm not sure if there are other options available since I've never received one, nor had anyone close me out). I bet these people are not active matches. I think when I log on later tonight, I'll turn my receive matches back to on, because out of my 35 matches (remembering I turned matches off a few days ago), I think only 13 are active members. I would like the police officer to respond though.
In other weekend news, on Saturday, I went to a baby shower. It's for a girl that I'm not super close with, but like, so I agreed to go. Thursday, I get a frantic call from the girl hosting the shower saying "Please don't bail on Saturday!" Apparently, no one RSVP'd to the shower. On Wednesday, she called the girl for whom the shower was for to see if anyone RSVP'd to her, because apparently I was the only one who did. No, that was it, just me, the girl having the baby, and the girl throwing the shower. I feel terrible. That is so sad. Who are these people that don't know how to RSVP one way or the other? I just was appalled by how rude some people are. I felt bad, it was going to take her two seconds to open our gifts, but on the bright side, I didn't have to play any "Guess How Big Mommy Is" games. Also, I always get a giant box of diapers as my gift. That's my thing. Most people get little clothes and cute things, because they are more fun to buy. But half the time, most of those things don't even get worn because the baby out grows them. At 10 diapers a day, I've decided diapers are the way to go, and are usually the most appreciated gift. Albeit, not the cutest, or most fun. No one is gooing and gawing when the mom opens a box of 200 Huggies, but I've always heard great feed back. Well, since there weren't a lot of people there at the shower, I did feel bad that she wouldn't have any cute things to open, but my gift was already bought, and I certainly wasn't going back into Babies R Us for fear that I might get pregnant just being around all those women and babies! The girl throwing the shower, went out and bought a ton of gifts, and wrapped them all separately so the girl would have a lot of presents to open. That girl has a heart of gold, I tell you. I mean, usually the shower is the gift.
I guess that's it. I may post again when I log on tonight. My rule was no eHarmony all day Friday -Sunday at 7pm. So, we'll see if I have any updates by that time.
xoxo, Maxine
Thursday, May 1, 2008
eHarmon-me: Day 5
Today's update will be pretty short. I didn't have the usual flood of emails into my inbox since I had turned matching off for awhile. Also, if I read correctly on eHarmony Blog, the person who initiates communication has to be the first to answer open ended questions, so I sent police officer some questions.
Let me tell you, thinking of good questions was stressful! There was a list you could choose from, but they were very serious, and marriage-oriented. I thought I did okay. We'll see what happens. I'm still waiting to hear back from two other guys. I think I'll see how next week goes, then maybe turn matching back on if I haven't heard anything.
On a side note, back to Major. He's been calling every other day. I wonder if he's trying to wean me off. As I sort of mentioned in my Day 1 Blog, last Sunday I had a lot to drink and decided to call Major. I talked to him about going and visiting. I said I didn't think I'd be able to get out there for a couple of months, and perhaps by the time I got out there, he'd be seeing someone, and it wouldn't be appropriate for me to come visit. His response was just "I doubt that" and sort of laughed. But he didn't say anything about me being the only one for him, or something like that. Then, I said I really missed him. I wasn't expecting "I love you Maxi. I think we should be serious and try this long distance." But I certainly wasn't expecting "thank you." That really hurt. Hence the reason I joined eHarmony to begin with. I was feeling rather fragile! But anyways, the calls are coming every other day now, instead of every day. And our conversations are quite shorter. I think it's time to let go. I do think he's just calling either out of habit, or because he's lonely. Either way, it's not an ideal foundation for a relationship.
xoxo, Maxi
Let me tell you, thinking of good questions was stressful! There was a list you could choose from, but they were very serious, and marriage-oriented. I thought I did okay. We'll see what happens. I'm still waiting to hear back from two other guys. I think I'll see how next week goes, then maybe turn matching back on if I haven't heard anything.
On a side note, back to Major. He's been calling every other day. I wonder if he's trying to wean me off. As I sort of mentioned in my Day 1 Blog, last Sunday I had a lot to drink and decided to call Major. I talked to him about going and visiting. I said I didn't think I'd be able to get out there for a couple of months, and perhaps by the time I got out there, he'd be seeing someone, and it wouldn't be appropriate for me to come visit. His response was just "I doubt that" and sort of laughed. But he didn't say anything about me being the only one for him, or something like that. Then, I said I really missed him. I wasn't expecting "I love you Maxi. I think we should be serious and try this long distance." But I certainly wasn't expecting "thank you." That really hurt. Hence the reason I joined eHarmony to begin with. I was feeling rather fragile! But anyways, the calls are coming every other day now, instead of every day. And our conversations are quite shorter. I think it's time to let go. I do think he's just calling either out of habit, or because he's lonely. Either way, it's not an ideal foundation for a relationship.
xoxo, Maxi
eHarmon-me: Blog Update
First, I want to say thank you to eHarmony Blog. I noticed today that you took the time to answer all my questions, and it was very much appreciated! When I get home, I can't wait to log onto your blog and see what all it's about. Unfortunately, I can get away with this mini blog while at work, but don't think I can get away with hours of reading blogs, when I should be working!
I do have another question then, if you'll be so kind as to answer (provided you read this).
As you've read, Radio answered my questions. Whose court is the ball in now? Do I have to make the next move? Or can either of us? And same with the police officer. He sent back his must haves/can't stands. I notice when I log in that it suggests for me to send second questions. Is he getting the same notice, or does he have to wait for me?
Thank you!
xoxo, Maxi
I do have another question then, if you'll be so kind as to answer (provided you read this).
As you've read, Radio answered my questions. Whose court is the ball in now? Do I have to make the next move? Or can either of us? And same with the police officer. He sent back his must haves/can't stands. I notice when I log in that it suggests for me to send second questions. Is he getting the same notice, or does he have to wait for me?
Thank you!
xoxo, Maxi
eHarmon-me: Day 4
I know I'm posting this a little late, but I didn't have time yesterday to update you. Of course I received the usual 7 matches in the morning.
Open: 18
In communication: 7
Closed: 17
Total matches received: 35
I felt like the matches were getting out of control, and I was just closing everyone, and was getting confused as to who was who, so I turned my matching status to "off." This means I won't receive any new matches until I change it back.
This makes me wonder something else. All the matches that haven't responded. Are their matches getting out of control as well? That's why they don't have time respond?
The police officer sent his must haves/can't stands back. And I received answers from one of the guys (the radio broadcaster) I was waiting for. But now I don't know who makes the next move. Technically for the police officer, I should send him my second questions. I haven't explored that yet, so I don't know what they are. And with Radio, I need to send my must haves. It seems like the person who makes the first communication gets it easy. The other person has to continue after that. I think I'm going to hold off for a little while and see if any of them respond back.
So, I didn't do anything last night other than log in, close some matches, and turn my match preference to "off."
xoxo, Maxi
Open: 18
In communication: 7
Closed: 17
Total matches received: 35
I felt like the matches were getting out of control, and I was just closing everyone, and was getting confused as to who was who, so I turned my matching status to "off." This means I won't receive any new matches until I change it back.
This makes me wonder something else. All the matches that haven't responded. Are their matches getting out of control as well? That's why they don't have time respond?
The police officer sent his must haves/can't stands back. And I received answers from one of the guys (the radio broadcaster) I was waiting for. But now I don't know who makes the next move. Technically for the police officer, I should send him my second questions. I haven't explored that yet, so I don't know what they are. And with Radio, I need to send my must haves. It seems like the person who makes the first communication gets it easy. The other person has to continue after that. I think I'm going to hold off for a little while and see if any of them respond back.
So, I didn't do anything last night other than log in, close some matches, and turn my match preference to "off."
xoxo, Maxi
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
